Times they are a changin'...

Everything in life has markers. My move, for instance, has a timeline of events that lead up to the big day. One key event, Justin's move, took place, and now my move seems eminent.

In regards to that, I have almost everything tied up in a neat little bow. I have decided that since I work hard, I deserve to make this as easy as possible. Translation: my moving company is going to pack for me, as well as ship everything I own, including my scooter.

Big spender, you question? Yes...but only when it counts. And peace of mind is priceless, so I'll pay the extra $750 for someone else to do the grunt-work for me.

But I can't help not being in a peaceful place knowing that my favorite thing in life right now is beyond my grasp. As Zach Braff says in Garden State,

"This is life...
and I'm in love with you, Samantha.
I think that's the only thing I've ever been really sure of in my entire life.
I'm really messed up now,and I got a lot of stuff I gotta work out.
But I don't want to waste any more of my life without you in it, okay?"

The hardest thing in the world is knowing what you want and not knowing how to make it happen, at a speed which seems reasonable. This is where I am.

Not to bore anyone with my girlie thoughts, but I'm a little down at the moment.

After 5 years in California, the thing that interested me most in the beginning is the same thing that interests me most in the end, and now he's off to Boston. So what do I do?

Well, I plan for the future. There's a couple of things to keep in mind. First, Justin said that he needs things to look forward to. All I can plan is his visit to Texas in July and my visit to Boston for New Years. Between those, my schedule and pocketbook will have to decide as time passes. Second, Justin has the same desires to travel as I do, so I have started a travel fund for us, both for yearly visits and for large summer excursions (Spain and South America are high on our lists).

My coworker told me to remember the 3 week rule: don't be apart for more than 3 weeks. Well, coworker, that seems impossible. All I can hope is that Justin feels a fraction of what I do, and that we will both try our damnest to make this work. Realistic? No. Idealistic? Yes. But as Melanie said, "people who have never been in love have no idea."

I am holding tight to a few basic ideas, mostly my own.

1. I have never felt how I feel about Justin for anyone else
2. He is well worth any wait
3. The universe (God) has a plan, and I just need to be patient

Beyond that, I try to stay excited about a number of things.

I'm excited to start a new life for myself, and for my cats who will love me their entire lives unconditionally. I'm excited for what the future holds, and for the chance to share it with those around me. I'm excited that I'm getting a promotion, and am one step closer to being a school administrator which, sadly, is my goal. I'm excited to be near family, and near a support system that has been unknown to me for over a decade now.

Do I have things to be sad about? Yes. But do I have a lifetime of things unknown to be ecstatic about? Yes. And so I wait patiently for my new life to play out and for, hopefully, someone to share it all with.

I hope you make it to Boston safely, Justin. But more than that, I hope that we each have a part in each others' exciting futures. Because it's going to be an awesome journey, and I hope I have someone to share each amazing moment with.

I'll drink to both of us tonight, as a couple, and as amazing individuals. Here's to getting what we want and deserve...

Cheers.

Life is a Highway

Have I hired a moving company to ship all of my belongings to Texas in a little over a month? No. Have I started to pack for my move? No. Have I even packed for my 4 day trip to San Francisco (which I leave for tomorrow)? No. Have I done anything, absolutely anything, at all productive at work or at home this week? No.

Did I leave work early yesterday to spend a carefree day at the beach with Justin? Yes. And I wouldn't have changed it for the world. Even if I did only get 4 1/2 hours sleep and had to commute 66 miles to work this morning...

Life is a highway,

I wanna ride it

All night long

If your going my way,

I wanna drive it

All night long

Tuesday's Words of Wisdom

Despite what I would like to believe, I am not always funny, and don't always have something profound to say. Shocking, I know.

Currently, I have a lengthy list of things to do and motivation to accomplish none. My teaching load is virtually nil, yet I cannot seem to meet even the most basic of deadlines. I have to finalize my apartment in Houston, hire a company to move all of my belongings, and start the Herculean task of packing. But the only thing that appeals to me is sitting on my couch, napping, and reflecting on this new chapter of my life that I am expecting to write itself.

Sigh. I'm such a Debbie Downer right now.

----------*----------*----------*----------

Here's a forward from my cousin-in-law. There're a few gems present here, and some good overall advice. Maybe I'll try to take some of that advice today. Lord knows I couldn't be more pessimistic.

ONE: Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO: Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE: Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR: When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.

FIVE: When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.

SIX: Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN: Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT: Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE: Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN: In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN: Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE: Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN! When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'

FOURTEEN: Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN: Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN: When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN: Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN: Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN: When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY: Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice

TWENTY ONE: Spend some time alone.

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I especially like #11.

And speaking of family, happy birthday Bubba.

sheribomb out.

Driving from the OC to LA sometimes seems like I'm traveling across the universe...

Two terrible accidents that lengthened the time of my already long commute, driving over an aluminum ladder at roughly 80 mph, and sitting shocked through one slightly scary earthquake later, I survived my last full weekend in Orange County with Justin and managed to find time to relax on my couch with my cats. Sunday's Netflix: Across the Universe.

I recommend this movie if:

1. You have 2+ hours to kill
2. You like the Beatles
3. You like musicals
4. You don't mind slow moving plot lines

That being said, I did not altogether enjoy or dislike this film. An unlikely romance forms between Lucy, a young WASPy girl whose fiance is killed in the war, and Jude, a blue collar young stud from Liverpool who lives in New York City. There are touches of commentary regarding the Vietnam War, an entire half-hour (at least) devoted to psychedelic drugs, and a plot line that's unnaturally fueled by the lyrics to countless Beatles lyrics.

The visual effects were absolutely amazing, and most of the film was aesthetically very pleasing. I'm glad that I finally saw it (and finally get to return it to Netflix), but would probably not see it again or recommend it to someone that does not meet criteria #1-4 above. And I'm not the only one who feels this way...

I give it 3 out of 5 stars. I didn't fall asleep, but I also didn't fall in love with either the Beatles or Jim Sturgess.

Maybe if I were on LSD the film would have made a better impression...

Happy Monday.

Instant kharma's gonna get you...

Disclaimer: I am not religious. I do believe that there is a God, and I do believe that everything has a way of working itself out in life. That being said, I don't prescribe to any particular monotheistic religion. I am very tolerant of other people's beliefs, however, and try to be respectful to all mankind regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, etc. That being said...

I had a hair appointment after school today. My friend Martin has been my hairdresser for the past 4 years and I think he's an absolute genius with a comb and scissors. After I spoke to him about my new relationship and the geographical turn it's about to take, he told me that he "doubted it will work out." "Don't you remember what you were like in college?" he asked, and I sighed.

After finishing my life-in-short recap, I asked what was new in his world. "I've been reading with the Jehovah's Witnesses," he says, much to my extreme shock. At this point, I completely disregarded his comment about Justin, dismissing him as "an unreliable source," and went on to nod and smile for the next 1+ hour of religious discussion.

To be honest, I found myself quite skeptical of all that he was saying and thought about how "cultish" I often find religion. The rampant hypocrisy, picking and choosing of Biblical messages to which to subscribe, and intolerance of other religions typically turns me quite off to the entire idea. So I listened patiently and told him, genuinely, that I was glad that he was happy, all the while thinking to myself that if I wasn't leaving California, I might need to find a new hairdresser.

After arriving home, as I began to close my garage I noticed something. I reopened my garage door and to my horror my car had been hit! Dear reader(s), I ask you to understand that less than a month ago I had $1,000 worth of body work done to repair my bumper (that a student hit) and to remove all dings and scrapes on the entire exterior of my dear Wendy (my car's name). So to see her blemished, with a broken tail light and a rather large blue and white scratch down her side, was depressing and frustrating. And curious.

Is God trying to prove a point? Was my lack of interest in Martin's stories and theories a catalyst for years of un-Christian-like behavior and an overall aversion to all things related to Jesus? It makes me wonder...

Although I'm not going to sign up for Sunday School quite yet, it does make return to my original personal goal of the year - to judge others less. And isn't that what life is about, finding signs and omens in the strangest of places, trying to refine your beliefs until you can be proud of yourself, your thoughts, and your actions? Well, I'd like to think that's what my life is about, and I would like to think that if I weren't leaving California, Martin would still be the man that I trusted with my hair and the friend that I trusted with my heart. So that's what I'm taking from all of this. I cannot change what has happened, but I can look at it from a different, less victim-like point of view.

I'm still really pissed about the car, though.

Time to go call my insurance company.

I hope the web world welcomes me back with open arms.

In 2004, I started a LiveJournal. Not that is was particularly good, but it was amazingly cathartic. For over two years I wrote prolifically about nearly every aspect of my life. I fell out of this habit soon after moving to California, when I could not afford to actually have the internet at home, but relied wholly on unsuspecting neighbors whose wireless connections were not password protected and also not particularly reliable.

Alas, the desire to broadcast the minutia of my life has resurfaced, and I find myself, once again, in front of the computer trying to will wit through my fingertips and out into cyberspace.

With the approaching changes in my life, it might be good to have a place to jot down my thoughts and ideas, no matter how mundane they might be. So to anyone who might read this, I apologize in advance for your possible waste of time. I will do my best to make my posts entertaining and culturally relevant, although I promise nothing. I will probably rant about things about which no one cares, and I will probably review movies about which no one has heard. I will most likely discuss my soon-to-be long-distance relationship and the closest thing I have to children - my cats. I can foresee complaining about kids, but rest assured, I love my job and I love teaching math.

In the end, remember that this blog is more for me than for my you. I can type infinitely faster than I can write by hand and, let's face it, I spill things on paper journals.

Happy Thursday, blogworld. It's good to be back.